Wednesday 8 April 2020

Long Distance Connections

Hello, everyone, I hope you are staying safe and well during these unusual times. I wanted to blog (for the first time in a long while) about something important to me and needs more understanding. This has become more spoken about recently due to the outbreak of the Corona Virus. Hopefully, during this period it will raise awareness of how precious connections can be with family, friends and pets for us all at and also generally when you don't find making those connections easy in the first place. I'm currently apart from my parents and border collie Toby- (animals can provide a lot of comfort to people who find social situations hard.)

As with all of my blogs I am only speaking from my perspective, everyone is different and experiences life differently. It's important to take the time to listen to someone and their story as an individual. Also, remember that there can be a lot more to someone's story than one blog post.

For some people making friends and finding people they connect with isn't easy. Especially if in their local area there isn't much understanding, awareness or opportunities which incorporate inclusion. It's easy for people to take for granted having family or friends living in close proximity, where you maybe can just pop round for a drink, a meal or a hug.

All of the above have applied to me. As a quieter person, who has always found social situations anxiety-provoking and had my fair share of misunderstandings and bullying. I also come from a quieter family and am an only child.  Making friends has never been easy for me and to be honest a really sensitive issue. I am dyspraxic and I have very different music taste to my peers and experience mental health issues of anxiety and depression. I also spend a lot of my time usually back home in Burnley Lancashire.  In short, it takes quite a long time to get to know Rosie and for Rosie to feel comfortable with people and to do things people maybe take for granted.

In the past, I've had difficult experiences of people not understanding why social situations and day to day life can be hard for me. Which is why understanding is important that not everyone has things close by and people do things in their own time. They didn't understand why I can't just do something, meet people, or go somewhere or why it's so anxiety-provoking for me. Also why my confidence in cities(and general) can be really difficult for me. Due to my difficulties, people didn't understand why it was taking me longer.  I've always struggled with low self-esteem and can also struggle with my mood too. It can make me overthink a lot and worry the same experiences will happen again, doubt how I'll be perceived and if people will always react the same. Anxiety can be tricky like that. The little things can mean a lot and make a difference.

Taking longer in life and being at distance from the people, things and pets I care about has made me an understanding, empathetic person who takes the time to listen. I'm grateful for the few people who take the time to listen to me and make me feel like my voice is important and matters.

After this period,  after seeing my family, dog and the few friends at distance I have. I want to build up my self-esteem and find more activities and connections where people accept me, and  I find my purpose to help with my mental health. Hopefully, in time I will be able to be more confident to be where I want to be in life, in my own way and time. Sometimes things aren't easy to explain, give a quieter person the time and space and you never know what you might learn.

Throughout this difficult time and in general please be kind to others, put yourself in other's shoes and understand that everyone is different and does things in their own time. Please don't compare time frames. If you see someone who's at distance from their loved ones show some kindness.

Take care of yourselves.
Until next time........




1 comment:

  1. Oh wow Rosie, I totally empathise with u, although I do live close to my family and I am the yongest of 4 children, but I have always had a difficult time being social and making friends. Even now at age 37 I dont have any friends who I see often, just my partners friends who I consider not my proper friends who I would feel comfortable being alone with (without my boyfriend). Ive always been bullied and have always suffered with anxiety. I just empathise with u so much, and want u to know that u are not alone in how u feel. Big hugs x

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