Friday, 5 December 2014

Self care, dealing with negative thoughts and looking after yourself

When we get caught up in the hustle and bustle of daily life we sometimes forget to look after ourselves, when you struggle with additional streses, anxieties, mental health issues, or sensory issues I think it's even more so important to make sure you take time out to look after yourself and you'll find the effect on productivity. For me personally the best thing I have done is take time and looked after myself. I got so wrapped up in helping other people, and I simply believed that other people were worth self care and being looked after more than me. When you're struggling sometimes it can feel like you don't deserve to have help or worthy of positive thoughts and it's times like these that self care can be vital. I think it's so important though that everyone considers their own self care, you don't just have to be diagnosed with a mental health issue, or  any oter struggles to give yourself some self care. Everyone can experience times of anxiety, stress, and sadness, some more than others and on a varying of degrees, and some for more prolongued amount of times, but we all need to give ourselves some tlc at times. Somtimes I tink blogs can become condition specific and people who maybe don't struggle with certain issues can feel like it wont be relevant to them or they're excluded from them, I hope this blog can help anyone out there.

During the worst times, when consumed by panic and despair, it can be hard to simply make it through each hour, and even harder to try to concentrate on anything or distract yourself. It can feel like your head is full of spagetti (when  you also add dyspraxia into the equation make that double tangled spaghetti.)

 When I feel very low and anxious my self-esteem hits rock bottom. I'm conscious about the simple things   I know this is all silly when I feel okay, but it's awful to feel like that when I'm really down. It stops me from going out, and I also feel badly about my personality on days like this. I feel like I'm a bad person and don't deserve any happiness in my life, and that I don't have anything worth giving to anyone. I also feel like noone would ever want to have anything to do with me because I'm an awful person and not someone you'd want to be around. A few months ago I would have probably felt like that for ages and didn't know what to do. In all honesty I would just start helping other people as a way to mask how I really felt. I will always always be passionate about helping people it's definately my calling in life but I realised I needed to help myself. Through advice and experiences I've been given through help I've recieved I'm going to list some points and strategies which might help other people. Wrongly there is such a long waiting time for professional help, a lot of people who are in desparate need have to wait so so long it's so unfair and even when you do get help you maybe get only a couple of sessions. So I hope this might help those who might be having that criteria. Or maybe just those who need a little bit of tlc.

This has taken a long time to happen but  when  I can tell or am triggered when a symptom raises it's head , by stopping it before it gets really bad. I can tell when it is about to come on, so I try and distract myself before I become really low.
The best advice first  I could give to those who like going on social media like myself is to turn your phone off, unless you are talking to someone who is going to help, refrain from going on sites such as Twitter, the world of Twitter can be such a mess these days, so much indirecting, so many intereting characters who we would never speak to in real life, follow people who understand you and make you feel good about yourself who you can trust, it doesn't make you a bad person if you feel like negativity on social media is bringing you down to step away from it, the people who know and care for you know who you really are. If you're struggling twitter can be trigger central sometimes, a whole tangled mess of celebrity culture. Follow people who may have other interests than celebrity cuture so your feed is more balanced and can be calmer. Having to take a little break from social media does NOT make you a bad fan of anyone who you support, live your life for you not just the celebritie you like. You're so much than a person who supports x,y,z and the real people who care like you for the person you are not just your interets. Sometimes it's easy to deal with your problems through supporting a celebrity, although celebrities can be a huge support and influence of positivity and inspiration especially at our lowest moments, they can give a lot of hope, it's also so important to deal with the struggles themseves at the same time, look after yourself as you as a person and build that up, you will feel a lot better in the long run and how to deal with situations which might occur in life I promise.

If it gets really bad the only way I’ve found to cope is either to sleep it off or to talk to someone about why I feel like that. Although when I get that bad I often take a lot of coaxing to talk to anyone – ironic really as it does help.

In the long run these self care ideas might help you feel calmer, more positive and less low and down and more balanced, always make time for you even if you hve lots of deadlines, making time for you is so important. I hope these help some of you, I hate using this word as it's become so overused on social media but you are woth recovery and feeling better about yourself.

1. Stay Active 
Make time every day to do some physical activity such as walking for 10 or 20
minutes I love walking my dog when I'm at home, I really miss doing this when I'm in London. Spending time with a pet can really calm you down and make you feel better about yourself.

2. Do something that you think is fun each day.
Even though you may need to work a little more at having fun, try doing
something that has always been fun such as a hobby or listening to music or
watching a favorite video or TV show.

3. Spend time with people who help or support you.
When you are feeling down/stressed/anxious it is easy to avoid people, but you should not be alone all the time. Choose people who you can talk to who understand you and who will help lift your mood.

4. Relaxing
 It can be hard to stop feeling sad or having unhappy thoughts. Physical activity can help and so can learning to relax. Have a bath, listen to some relaxing music, read a book, have a cup of tea even if its for 5 minuites.

5. Set simple goals.
Do not expect too much too soon. Do simple things  and focus on one task at a time s. Delay big decisions until you are feeling better. Give yourself credit for each thing you do and break work into small steps.

6.  Have a wall/box of positivity
Have a wall or box full of things or quotes people have given you, things which make you feel positive, look at them when you feel down to help boost your mood.

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