Sunday, 2 August 2015

Day To Day Life

My next blog focuses on something which I think deserves a lot more attention and something which a lot of people are unaware of, it's about how much day to day life can effect someone with a hidden difference, especially dyspraxia. Day to day tasks are something which a lot of us just do automatically and probably not put any thought into it, but for people with dyspraxia/dyslexia  or any  other hidden difference we have to think of every single movement and every single little thing. Things like using fine motor skills to do fiddly stuff, cooking and preparing food, trying co-ordinate our bodies so we can attempt to walk in a straight line and try and balance not to fall over whilst trying to get out of the house on time with everything we need, and that's before we have even have left the front door, maybe with a few bonus spillages down us.

A lot of people in life have expected me to grow out of my dyspraxia/dyslexia like suddenly I entered the adult world and became neurotypical somehow. When I received my degree and then my masters degree two things which I'm very very proud of people assumed that I must have overcome everything and things not to effect me anymore,  or and this is why I wanted to write this blog to highlight that issues don't just suddenly go away, we may develop coping strategies and focus on the things we're good at and often find a different way of doing things but often people can still struggle with day to day tasks or need to take a lot of time and energy to carry them out which can lead to tiredness and fatigue it can also have a huge impact on self esteem and confidence. Each person has their unique neuro diverse profile and may have different overlaps or co-currences with other differences. That's why it's so important to ask the individual person to find out more.

Needing a little bit of help and support in life with whatever issues you might be struggling with is nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about, and at the same time if you see someone who needs a little bit of help don't judge or make assumptions why without knowing the full story, if someone is trying that's the main thing.  I always say my boyfriend is the organisation of the relationship and I'm the creative one. He helps me organise my life, and work out where I need to be and when and try his best to remember where I might of put things and I can offer creative and different ways to solving problems. It's important to work out what works for you, and use the strengths of the people around you.  .

Day to day life can come into aspects of life  like needing a seat to sit down on the bus or train as a lot of dyspraxics can struggle with balance and co-ordintion and the speed at some bus drivers drive at it's literally grip for deal life, but not everyone understands why. A lot of us can struggle in new environments or ones which have a lot of sensory issues, so it can take us a while to adjust and feel more comfortable and calm those anxiety levels down a bit and be able to socialise as situations can get very overwhelming for us. When people think of clumsiness in adults they often think it must be alcohol induced, the amounpt of times people have come up to me and assumed I must have had lots to drink. The dyslexic side of things might be miss reading signs got me into a few amusing situations, someone at my work's dyslexic husband misread their holiday destination and ended up booking a flight to the wrong place which caused them a lot of amusement at the airport. It all comes down to the invisibility of it all and sometimes I wish the outside world could see what is going on inside the brain so they could understand why.

Over time a lot of us do develop coping strategies to help manage these day to day issues and when you do be very proud of yourself, find what works best for you and fits in with your life and routines, keep trying and don't beat yourself up if you make a mistake,  it might be a long road and a lot longer road but be proud of your determination and perseverance it's such an amazing quality to have, always be kind you never know what people are facing. If you see someone struggling in life no matter how old they are, go give them a hand don't walk by, you might just make their day a little brighter.

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